S4 Ep17: What If There’s Nothing You Can Do About That?
Recognize and acknowledge what you do and don’t (can and can’t) control
The world is at your fingertips.
On the one hand, this is incredible. Only in the last two or three decades have we had the power to learn and know anything at all about any topic whatsoever.
On the other hand, this is terrible. There is so much information available that it can be incredibly overwhelming. What’s more, finding fact versus opinion – informed or utter BS - is another challenge that can only be overcome by choice and action.
Parsing out the information constantly bombarding you can be increasingly challenging. It’s even harder when many of the solutions you’re offered line someone’s pockets and at best offer temporary comfort or relief.
Is there anything you can do about that?
Misrepresentation of selfishness
When you let your mind, body, and spirit fall into disrepair, you experience ill health, depression, anxiety, crises of faith, disassociation, and other signs of poor health, wellness, and wellbeing.
You, and you alone, can make choices and decisions to care for your mind, body, and spirit. Genuine selfishness is done with malice of forethought. Hence, self-care, and putting your own health, wellness, and wellbeing first are not selfish acts.
Is there anything you can do about that?
The world seems to be going quite mad, right? Yet, there’s an important question about this that you might not ask. Is there anything that you can do about that?
The answer is going to vary from person to person. For the most part, it’s “that depends”. Overall, however, the answer is going to be no. That doesn’t mean there’s nothing at all I can do about these things.
Why does knowing the limits of what you can do about that matter?
Does it do you any good to worry about things outside of your control? If you give large swaths of your time, attention, and energy to these terrible things, constantly watch the news, and scan social media, can you change them? Are you a bad person if you don’t give them more than a passing thought and basic, vague acknowledgment? NO.
Why? Because you can control only a limited, few things directly. All of them are or start within you and belong solely to you.
Specifically, you can control your thoughts, feelings, actions, intentions, approach to matters tangible and intangible, choices, and decisions. That’s it. How? Active conscious awareness.
Practicing mindfulness
My definition of mindfulness is active conscious awareness in action. What that means is not just going with the flow or living by rote and routine, but asking questions here and now, in the present moment, to become actively consciously aware.
If you worry, fret, and focus on things you can do nothing about, you can choose to change that. Recognizing, acknowledging, and working with this can change your life in multiple ways. How? By changing your focus to things that you can do something with and/or about.
This week’s Applied Guidance for Mindfulness Tool:
For the next week, practice the following:
Whenever you read something online, watch the news, are told something by friends, family, or anyone else, about a problem, challenge, issue, horror, or whatever, ask,
Is there anything I can do about this?
If the answer is yes, consider doing something about whatever “this” is. If the answer is no, however, work to let it go, release it, or just don’t think about it beyond the initial conversation.
At the end of the day, write down anything that has stuck with you that you can’t do anything about. Then, to alleviate the tension it’s still causing, write down,
“I’m sorry there’s nothing that I can do about that.”
Does this make you feel better and free up brain capacity for other things?y and spirit, specifically.
Use this tool to better know yourself in all possible ways.
Blogs: titaniumdon.com and mjblehart.medium.com
Original cover art artist Fe Mahoney: https://www.etsy.com/shop/TaliasInspirations