Ep. 5 Hey, what are we talking about?
Hey nice to meet you! I’m Desiree Jones or Dez for Short and welcome to the podcast that teaches you how to establish your network and maintain relationships both on and off your screen.
Today’s Topic? Hey, what are we talking about?
You can’t network without having a conversation. Starting a conversation can be a bit nerve-racking, however the sole purpose of a conversation is to establish an interactive dialogue (formal or informal) with someone. The goal is to have intentional conversation, and what you say can dictate how the conversation will go.
BOOK OF THE DAY!
Reading is fundamental, and it’s very important to continue to make it a habit. If you prefer audio books that’s fine, but something about the touch of a book and the flip of a page just brings solitude to the mind. So with that, today’s book I’d like to shout out first is….
It’s About Damn Time by Arlan Hamilton.
Hey, what are we talking about?
I also want to advise you to write this down! As mentioned in my last episode, writing helps you learn, earn, and what? REMEMBER. So if you really want to do better with networking, take some notes.
When starting a conversation think of the conversation you want to have in 3 sections:
Introduction
Compliment/Compassion
Intention of Talking
I broke it down into 3 sections because you want to make sure there’s a beginning, middle and end to a conversation. When you’re networking, especially when connecting with people for the very first time, you don’t want to just start talking and rambling on forever. You want to keep it short and sweet. So this is broken down to help guide the conversation.
When someone you don’t know approaches you, or contacts you, wouldn’t you want to know who they are? I know I do. This is why introducing yourself is very important. When introducing yourself, start by saying hello and state your name. Then after stating your name, give 2-3 facts about who you are and what you do.
1 - Introduction
The introduction is like the appetizer of your conversation. Or when someone says, So tell me a little bit about you. This is what they mean.
If you’re a student, let the person you’re talking to know that you’re a student as well as the school you attend. If you’re no longer in school, talk about your occupation or what brings you to the location/event/DM’s etc.
I’m Desiree Jones
A recent grad from Hampton University with my B.S. in Marketing. I’m passionate about content strategy, video editing and I have my own podcast that talks about the fundamentals of Networking.
Now when you listen to my introduction there were a lot of things I mentioned. I mentioned a lot because as a listener, it gives you an overall skulp of who I am and it gives you, the listener different things about me you could retain and remember me by.
Anytime you talk to someone ALWAY state your name and what you do. Always. Because if you don't, the conversation you have will not be remembered long term. Your name holds weight, it holds value, and when you connect with someone you don't want them to be like, dang I forgot their name. Who are you again?
Sidebar, if you don’t know who you are, I talk about self identity in another episode so check it out!
So the first step to starting a conversation is the introduction. The next step
2 - Complement or something of Gratitude
After introducing yourself, providing a compliment or a sense of compassion is also important. When you’re meeting someone new, sometimes the person you’re reaching out to may also be nervous, providing a compliment or a compassionate statement about them, can break that nervous tension (break the ice) before getting to the intention of why you are talking with them.
A compliment or a sign of compassion could be anything.
“Thank you for taking the time to chat with me.” “I hope you’re enjoying your day.” If there’s a holiday during the time you’re connecting with them, wish them a happy holiday. If you’re at a conference and they’re a speaker, thank them for speaking.
I’m Desiree Jones
A recent grad from Hampton University with my B.S. in Marketing. I’m passionate about content strategy, video editing and I have my own podcast that talks about the fundamentals of Networking.
I really appreciate you taking the time to share your story
Listening to your story really encourages me to keep going
Showing gratitude or providing a compliment shows that you care. A compliment or a token of gratitude always helps the conversation flow because it provides the person you’re talking to with a sense of feeling appreciated. And appreciation goes a long way.
So when starting a conversation, first, have an introduction, second provide a compliment or a sense of compassion. Then third, your intention of talking.
3 - Intention of Talking
By this point, if you’ve introduced yourself and said a compliment, the person you’re talking to should be open to the next portion of what you have to say. Now what it is that you want to say isn’t something that can be taught, that's something that comes from within.
This is where you say whatever it is you’d like to ask? This is what you talk about.
I’m Desiree Jones
A recent grad from Hampton University with my B.S. in Marketing. I’m passionate about content strategy, video editing and I have my own podcast that talks about the fundamentals of Networking.
I really appreciate you taking the time to share your story
Listening to your story really encourages me to keep going
I had a quick question about *blah blah blah blah blah*
Or You mentioned *blah blah blah blah blah*
Or I’d like to know more about *blah blah blah blah blah*
You see what I mean?
The intention of you talking is like the entree to the conversation. What you decide to talk about depends on what it is that you want to know from them?
So again, when thinking about what it is you want to talk about remember to have 3 things ready.
An Introduction, A Compliment/Compassion, an an Intention of Talking
Then it all went left
So this is a segment where I talk about a situation that went totally terribly left but led to the right path.
So a few years ago I went to a summit and I got a chance to meet Erica Cambell. Erica Cambell is a gospel singer that was in a group called Mary Mary
*sings shackles* off feet
So we were all in line to meet her and when I finally got a chance to meet her, I choked up and a huge wave of emotion poured out of me. I started crying a little bit but then , I caught my composer and just said thank you. And scurried away. She probably thought I was crazy but growing up I used to listen to Mary Mary on repeat so seeing her for the first time really through me off my square. I was so nervous and just shook that I forgot I existed in that moment.
What did you learn?
So this is a segment where I talk about a situation that went totally terribly left but led to the right path.
So a few years ago I went to a summit and I got a chance to meet Erica Cambell. Erica Cambell is a gospel singer that was in a group called Mary Mary
*sings shackles* off feet
So we were all in line to meet her and when I finally got a chance to meet her, I choked up and a huge wave of emotion poured out of me. I started crying a little bit but then , I caught my composer and just said thank you. And scurried away. She probably thought I was crazy but growing up I used to listen to Mary Mary on repeat so seeing her for the first time really through me off my square. I was so nervous and just shook that I forgot I existed in that moment.
100 Commandments of Confidence
Thou shall not let a setback or missstep in life determine who you are meant to be. While I was working at home depot, were there times where I felt like… man, my life sucks. Absolutely. Especially when you’re working an afternoon shift in garden on a hot day and someone else asks for 50 bags of mulch that you gotta hand stack in someone's truck by yourself. Yeah, it sucks, but it was only for a season. It didn’t last forever. Confidence is about not letting negative circumstances deter you from having a positive outlook on who you are. Even while lifting marble chips on a truck I knew I was still confident in myself. I was confident in getting the job done, and I was confident in being the best person I could be while doing it. A setback or a misstep could be preparation for the new. Confidence is being able to believe in yourself through any circumstance.
Follow Up Hack
Example:
Follow Up Hack
When you’re sending an email OR talking to a professional, remember to have the following:
A greeting with name following
A thank you at the end
Your name or tag line at the bottom that has all of your information connected to it.
Keep it short and to the point.
Outro:
If this resonated with you, let us know! Give us a review, share this with your friends. Make sure to subscribe to us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify and other platforms. I hope these takeaways take you to greatness. It was nice meeting you, thank you for listening and shine bright.